Dawn Robertson is a wife, home-schooling mother of three sweet girls, a childrens Sunday school teacher and deacon at MCC. She knows all about being ask "those" questions, come along with us as she helps us navigate how to answer them with honesty, God's Word, love and truth.
Tears, it started with tears, as is typical in a house full of girls. “It’s just not FAIR! How can my friend have so many medical problems and I’m perfectly healthy?!”
Well, I guess it actually started with an epi pen which led to the tears. It started in the van while we were returning the epi pen and allergy kit to my daughter’s good friend.
How do we handle these big questions when they come from little mouths? Kids ask questions, because they think deeply about things, and often they ask these questions at the most inopportune times! In the car when they see a homeless man or woman on the street, when they overhear a conversation they should not have, when life happens and they start growing up too fast!
How do we handle these big questions? Here are some ideas to get you started!
- Be in the Word yourself. If I am not in the Word, I am not equipped to handle mothering, homeschooling, or training these small-ish humans God has loaned me.
- Pray for Guidance.
- Tackle the question when it is asked. This can be hard but it’s important. Their hearts are most responsive when they are thinking on it. Later they may have forgotten all about the question, or even worse, you might forget.
- Be honest. If you don’t know, say so. If you agree that the question is difficult, admit it. If it seems unfair or hurtful, be up front.
- Remind them of what we do know, particularly about God’s character and His Word. Remind them what we know of God’s character, both by naming some things, and by having them name some.
- Talk about the good things you can see coming about because of this, and good things that could come about, with the understanding that we ultimately did not know for sure. Use examples, from the Bible and your life to illustrate that God can use all things for his purpose.
- If possible, end with Scriptures.
- If they still have questions, encourage them to ask other trusted adults. This gives them the understanding that their parents won’t pretend to have all the answers and that there is a community of like-minded believers they can trust and confide in.
On my best days I get it all right, in the right order! But sometimes I don’t get it all right, you might not either, and it’s okay because God’s grace is big enough for both of us. Here are some things I’ve learned to avoid.
- Don’t get angry when the questions get asked. The timing may be inconvenient or the question irritating, but it’s important to them.
- Don’t make stuff up. If there is no “neat” resolution to the question, admit it. It is okay for our children to know that there are questions that will remain unanswered in this life, and that ultimately, we must trust God.
So this time, I was driving from Edgewood to Cedar Crest, with no Bible, no concordance, no Bible dictionary….just me, the girls, and the Holy Spirit. Who knows when the next Big Question will come……all I know is that in Him I was equipped to show her sincere compassion and point her back to God’s goodness. I could soothe her heart. And by His grace and guidance, I will be able to do it again and again.
Check out our children's ministry page for opportunities for your childen to get involved at MCC!
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MCC Elders and Connectors are hosting a Starting Point Lunch on January 13th after 2nd service. The luncheon is a great way to learn more about MCC, ask questions and meet new people! We encourage anyone who is considering making MCC their church home to attend and get connected! Contact Elizabeth to RSVP today.
For any ladies interested in prophetic literature or wanting to begin a Bible Study in the New Year, MCC is starting a new Bible Study in January! What is the heart behind the roar of the Lion from Zion? In this 16-week study through the book of Amos, beginning January 7th and meeting Monday mornings at 10 a.m., you will learn about a loving God who prepares His people to live forever. We hope you will consider joining us for this fantastic study! Child care is provided. Please contact Elizabeth Allan to learn more.
If you have ever felt like you don't fit in, that you aren't good enough, that everyone else has it together while you struggle to even show up, then we invite you to join us. We want you to learn that we have a God who lifts the pain of worthlessness and rejection! Starting Thursday, January 17th, Sara Ghormley and Elizabeth Allan will lead discussions as we prayerfully work through Ed Welch's book, "Shame Interrupted". We begin at 6:30 and end at 8, and will meet for 16 weeks. Cost is $16 per person, but scholarships are available. Please contact Elizabeth and let her know so she can order a book for you.
Would you like to learn how to respond to conflict Biblically? Pastor Frank Malizzo, Elizabeth Allan and Spencer Brown are hosting a Peacemaking as Evangelism Workshop at MCC on January 25th-26th. The class will highlight Biblical tools that can be used for work, in the community, in the home and as a tool for evangelism. “Conflict presents unique opportunities to serve other people, we can demonstrate the love of Christ and give witness to the gospel even to people who are attacking us.” Ken Sande. Contact Elizabeth to learn more.