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Summertime can strike both anticipation and anxiety in the heart of any parent. On the one hand, we’re thrilled to have slower and warmer days ahead, fewer commitments on the calendar, and more free time with our kids. On the other hand, all that free time can be downright daunting. The pressure to make the most of summer, to execute the perfect plan, to squeeze a lifetime of meaning and memories out of just one season is paralyzing.

This is my 20th summer as a mom, and I still get both giddy and stressed out with every dawning June. But I’ve come to appreciate how summer allows for sweet and unique rhythms that the rest of the year doesn’t. With a little planning, you and I cannot just survive the summer—we can make it a time to point our kids to the Lord and have fun along the way.

Tried and True Rhythms

Here are a handful of my favorite tried and true rhythms from over two decades of parenting during the summer months.

1. Make consistent, small deposits.

Summertime is like all good things in life—slow and steady deposits build wealth over a lifetime. You don’t have to go big this summer. When I asked my young adult and older teen kids what they cherished about our summers, they all replied with simple daily things: slow mornings, reading challenges at the library, swimming at the local pool, and visiting the same aquarium year after year. Their fondest memories grew from consistency. Pick a few things you love to do as a family and stick with them. They’ll shape your children more than trying to come up with new and exciting ideas every day.

2. Aim for progress over perfection in spiritual growth.

You don’t have to read the whole Bible or memorize an entire catechism this summer. How about reading one page of a special devotional book at breakfast? Or picking one book of the Bible and reading a small portion together at lunch? Or selecting an adventurous novel with biblical themes to read aloud at night before bed? These habits are far from flashy, but your kids will be talking about those Bible verses and read-aloud books for years to come.

You don’t have to read the whole Bible or memorize an entire catechism this summer. Consider what you can do to make small spiritual deposits in your kids’ lives. 

3. Serve together.

One source of joy for our family has been serving together in some way every summer. Some years this has meant a cross-cultural mission trip. But many years it meant the kids making something with their own hands to sell for a special cause.

One year they made popsicles in paper cups and sold them at the community garage sale. They called it “Popsicles for Poverty” and gave all the money to Compassion International. The girls and I looked back at those photos this week and shared a laugh. At the time, I remember it feeling messy (and even a little cringey). I wondered if it was worthwhile. But I’ve learned that a rhythm of serving every summer affects the tone of the whole year.

4. Get out in nature together.

Take walks, go to the creek, find worms in the dirt, grow some plants, capture some caterpillars and watch them turn into butterflies, or make a list of the birds that come near your windows. These good gifts right outside your home are food for the soul and will give you ample opportunity to point your kids to the beauty of creation and the worth and goodness of their Creator.

5. Pick something to pray for.

Devote your summer prayers to something specific—maybe a certain country, people group, or continent. The goal here isn’t long, belabored prayer time but rather opening your kids’ eyes (and yours!) to a need you may not normally see. Place a map, a photo, or some kind of visual reminder next to the dinner table or your child’s bed and simply pray for that same thing each day.

6. Make a loose plan.

We all have different styles and cultures in our families. There’s no one right way to do summer. I’ve found, though, that a loose plan is helpful. When we start our summer days with zero agenda, it tends to go badly. Rather than creativity and joy, there’s complaining and meltdowns.

You don’t need to schedule every half hour, but creating a rhythm your kids can count on is so helpful. Rotating between quiet time and play time throughout the day struck a happy balance for us.

Share Life and the Gospel

The long, slow days of summer are a great time to recalibrate as a family. Rather than succumbing to any internal or external pressure to have an epic summer, ask yourself instead, How can I commend the Lord to my kids over the next three months (Ps. 145:4)? Steady acts of faithfulness will serve you and your family well. Sharing your life and the gospel with them will be time well spent (1 Thess. 2:8).

Take it from me, a mom who has just one of four little birds left in the nest: daily habits and nourishing rhythms over these summer months will shape your kids the way dripping water creates a canyon. The growth is happening. The fruit will appear. Keep serving, praying, and playing.

TheGospelCoalition. How to Survive Summer with Kids. June 22, 2023. Jen Oshman.

https://www.thegospelcoalition.org/article/survive-summer-kids/

I have noticed now as an adult that we all look back to those years some time ago when we were kids. Whether our childhood was wonderful or difficult, it is those moments that shape how we see the world, and what we value in life. We don’t think about it much when we are that age. Especially for those of us growing up in a home of believing parents who know how to guide and direct us. We don’t realize how much of our world is being shaped, but it is. 

When I was in middle school, God turned on the light in my heart and uncovered a truth about His character through His Word that I had never quite understood before - His unconditional love. It did not matter how much of a mess I was and still am, He loves me. What got me, however, was not the fact that He loved me, but the fact that He cared about what I cared about. What mattered to me, mattered to Him. 

What I cared about began to change as well. Jesus says to store up our treasures in heaven, not in this world. That verse changed my perspective. It wasn’t about being a good person, doing good deeds, living a good life, obeying all the laws, or any of those things that had previously made me feel good about myself. It was about the people who are coming with me to heaven someday.

I looked around and watched my peers, friends, and younger cousins. They were going to church because they had to. They were praying and reading God’s Word because they were asked to. It also appeared to me several of their teachers or Bible study leaders seemed to walk into church, speak words into the room and checkmark a box that recorded their “good deed for the week”. It bothered me some. I cared about my peers but didn’t have the platform to speak truth. It seemed to me that some of these teachers didn’t value the opportunity.

A few years later, God pushed me into the work myself. He wanted me to do it a different way, the way that I was taught by my parents, and my own high-school youth group leader: the personal way. What I mean by this is to allow the kids to see my own mistakes. It isn’t always fun, but I hope they know that I care about what they care about. God loves them, and He loves what He created them to get excited about. I want kids to understand this by seeing my example. I want to be invested in who they are, not just waiting for them give me the right answer. Many kids may know the answer, but God doesn’t want the words, He wants their hearts.

Sometimes I sense that they don’t understand. Most of the time, it’s just a routine for them. I know it was like that for me when I was their age, I can’t expect anything different from them. Yet, if they hear the truth, and see that I care about who they are, these are the memories that will never leave them. I have to be willing to address problems I see in their character; I have to be willing to say no to things that sound fun (even to me). Sometimes I’ll get to say yes to things, and then I have to be willing to take the fall for my own poor decisions. In the end though, when they look back, they’ll see Jesus doing his perfect work through an imperfect person who truly cared. 

We asked the children of our church what they are thankful for and here are their responses! 

Lucas: My family, food and God

Bree: Friends, family, soccer and my mom's new car

Enoch: Animals

Eloise: Unicorns

JJ: My sister

Jasper: Ships

Georgia: My mom and dad

James: My dog

Ezra:  My family

Gideon: Snow

Thomas: My family

Rose: My family and everything God gave me

Jenna: ALL!

Luke: Family and friends

Brielle: Family

Vera: Family, clothes, God, bed, Bible, water and food

Zoe: Bree, family, Rose, life, God, jiu-jitsu, food, shelter and definitely Cheezits

Ravi: Hot Cheetos 

Evelyn: my family, the trees and my bed

Sophia: Always having a roof over my head and food to eat

Maddon: My mom and dad

Madison: My dog Thunder

Josiah: Pumpkin pie

Olena: God and Jesus

Jaxson: God

What a sweet reminder of all we can thank God for! 

I once knew a little girl who grew up in a family where both parents were alcoholics; she was the baby of three girls, all 5 years apart. The parents moved their family across the country away from all family support and oversight, so they were in survival mode and didn't make time to raise the girls. Their motto was, "children are to be seen and not heard". Frequently there was no money for food, and her parents were too proud to get the girls on a free or reduced lunch rate at school.

At the age of six, the Sunday before this little girl’s first day of school EVER, her mom walked her to school, explaining to turn left at the Jack-and-Jill Donut shop to get to school. Then she was instructed to "walk in through those doors tomorrow when you get to school, find an adult, tell them your name, they will help you get to your class." So, the next day the 6-year-old little girl dutifully got out of bed, got dressed, and walked to school in a very bad neighborhood.

The girls rarely felt welcome inside the home or safe outside in the bad neighborhood, and drama was ever present, as one would expect in that kind of environment. One night the parents had a Christmas party (there was somehow always enough money for alcohol), and the little girl got scared, so she asked her mom to come lie down with her until she fell asleep. But her father yelled at her, scaring her even more. One of the party guests came to the rescue, offering to lie down with the little girl, saying she was tired anyway because she was pregnant.

That sweet lady told that little girl that night all about Jesus and how, if she prayed, Jesus would hear and answer her prayers. Then she asked if they could pray together. The little girl enthusiastically agreed - she didn't have any other adults to help her, maybe this Jesus would. 

She just couldn't stop thinking about that, so in all the infinite wisdom of a 6-year-old, she decided to test this out. She wanted a dog so badly, but she knew there wasn't enough food for the humans, what was the likelihood of getting a dog? But what did she have to lose? So, operation 'DOG PRAYER' began - and within a week the prayer lady and her family were moving and couldn't take their basset hound, Precious, and voila! PRAYER ANSWERED! Hmm, she thought, this Jesus is pretty cool and proceeded to pray for a bike - just as unlikely as the first prayer. Maybe even less likely, because her parents were both animal lovers. So, Operation 'BIKE PRAYER' commenced. It wasn't long before some of the neighborhood kids all donated pieces and parts from their bikes, and her dad put it all together and painted it and Voila! Another PRAYER ANSWERED!

"I will be forever grateful for that precious lady who stood up to my Dad, comforted me that Christmas season, and introduced me to Jesus."

Not long after that, the parents were "out" and their car got towed back to the home before either parent came back. There were two head prints busted through the windshield with blood all over everything. The dad ended up in jail and the Mom in the hospital that night. So, the little girl's prayers turned into some much more important topics than a bike or a dog.

But eventually she forgot about Jesus and prayer all together.

It wasn't until she was in her late 20's that she picked up a Science magazine that had an article about dogs that the Bible came into her radar - an unlikely source, I know - but that's just how God works!  The article told of a study where they brought two sets of dogs into a clinic and tested to make sure they were all healthy. Then they cut into the dogs’ bones to make sure the bone marrow was good. One group of dogs were caged separately for two weeks and only their basic survival needs were met. No love, no interaction with the techs or the other dogs. The second group of dogs all got to live together, and the techs would love and play with them a lot. Then they cut into the bones again, and the dogs who lacked the love, affection, and companionship had the bone marrow drying up. The article then quoted Prov 17:22:

"A cheerful heart is good medicine, but a crushed spirit dries up the bones."

That was enough to make me think, "If that's true, what else in the Bible is true". That little girl was me - and as I look back over my life, I can see - God was with me, watching over and protecting me the whole time - ever since that first prayer I prayed at the age of 6.

I want to take this opportunity to thank each and every one of you who takes the time to love and care for you own kids, and a very special thanks to those of you who love and care for your kids’ friends. You never know what they are dealing with at home. The kindness and love of an adult for a child is PRICELESS, and you never know what God's Plan for them is - I will be forever grateful for that precious lady who stood up to my Dad, comforted me that Christmas season, and introduced me to Jesus.

Merry Christmas Everyone!

There is something so special and heartwarming about the easy connection that forms between people who are just beginning to live their lives and those who have lived a good, full life that is coming to a close. Seeing the special bond between the Greatest Generation and children never fails to touch my heart.

We recently had the opportunity for our kids to serve Thanksgiving lunch at the Edgewood Senior’s center, along with my sister’s boys. I really didn't know what to expect when we got there, but what I definitely did not expect was how much the kids would all love serving. The boys would wait eagerly for trays of food to take to each person, and when they set the food down in front of each person, they would smile gently and quietly say ‘Happy Thanksgiving’ and then quickly walk/run off to retrieve another tray to serve. It really caught me by surprise to see how much joy there was on their young faces as they spent the afternoon serving those who spent their best years serving us and our country.

That’s not to say that the whole afternoon went off without a hitch. My 3 year old daughter was eager to help alongside her big bothers and cousins and there were a few battles of the will as she walked to a table carrying a tray, and I tried to walk along with her, helping to steady the tray so that it didn't end up all over the floor. Fortunately, the seniors were gracious and found humor at her strong will instead of being upset that their lunch almost ended up on the floor, or that their mashed potatoes may or may not have had a little thumb stuck in them by little hands trying to grip a large tray.

"The kids got to learn that we can bring glory to God through serving others, and that serving others is actually fun!"

When all of the trays had been handed out, the kids set to work cleaning up the empty plates. They were such eager helpers that we had to make sure they didn't clear any plates that weren't done. During this time they got to visit with many of the people who had come for lunch, and were gifted with candies, smiles, and hugs. When all of the work was complete and it was time to go, the kids were all bummed because they had such a great time serving others and getting to know those they had served.

It was such a blessing that the Edgewood Senior Center allowed these young children to come and serve Thanksgiving lunch, both for the seniors, but even more so for my kids and nephews and their parents.

The kids got to learn that we can bring glory to God through serving others, and that serving others is actually fun! They got to see that true joy comes not through the toys that we have or our fancy clothes or cars or houses, but through showing God’s love to those around us. This Christmas season we are working hard to make sure that our kids know the real reason that we are celebrating the season, and to keep the focus off of the presents and on the love God has for us, and showing that love to others.